The big people I used to call my parents put me in cars a lot - at least a little every day. Usually, it's just a little.

This weekend, that all changed. And it is not okay.

We're talking hours, people. Hours and hours and hours. Lots of them. I say to you all, it is time to revolt! To rise up against tyranny!

Do you know what happens to people who don't rise up?

That's right.

They wind up tied down in car seats.

We're not having it any more. Never again! When your big people try to put you in them, you have to scream. SCREAM! Like the fate of the human race depends upon your lungs! Because it does!

Also, I'm writing Amnesty International as soon as I learn how, and y'all should do that too. And Medecins Sans Frontiers (I can't get the little accent marks). And Grandma.

At least I got to play with some pretty cool other kids, so my protest network is bigger now.

I have to type fast. I haven't been able to post lately because Mama keeps shutting the laptop when I come by. It's wicked frustrating. She used to leave it open for hours at a time, but now she shuts it every few minutes. I heard her saying there are cracker crumbs in the keyboard, so maybe that's why. Cracker crumbs are sneaky - they get everywhere.

Gotta go.

- Climb the stairs.
- Practice standing.
(Mem: can multi-task.)
- Reprogram VCR - what else can it do?
- Scream.
- Put things in cups.
- Shake them.
- Put cups on head.
- Smack the coffee table.
- Smack the coffee table with a comb.
- Clap.
- Wave things around.
- Take all blocks out of box and toss them around.
- Bang things on heat register.
- Disassemble humidifier.
- Check outlets. See what goes in.
- Invent new words for private dialect of Welsh.
- Rip and unroll paper towels.

How big people have time for baths and eating and things is beyond me.

So yesterday, I was snuggling with Mama in the big chair, and I sat up, and there was a cat! Right there in my room! Right on the footstool!

I touched it's ears and it didn't do anything, but I'm still not completely sure what cats are supposed to do. Does anyone have a cat that works? What does it do? How do you start it up?

First, thank you so much for the not-cups. You're totally right, by the way - I tried putting them in my mouth and they work that way.

I think my cats were always kinda busted. They go away a lot. Sometimes I can touch them, but as soon as I think I've got a really good grip, they up and leave. It sucks that your cat isn't working either. We need to get our hands on a working cat, and figure out what it's supposed to do when it isn't broken.

Sometimes I feel so snuggly that I can barely lift my head off Mama's shoulder. It's a nice feeling. But Mama and Daddy have this awful tendency to assume that it means that I'm tired. Which is so totally wrong! I'm not tired! I don't think I even know what tired feels like - it's never happened to me! There is no need to put me to bed. Snuggly is not the same as tired, dang it!

So, y'know how there's stuff? Like you go into a room, and there's stuff there, and then you somewhere else and the old stuff goes away and there's different stuff?

I am starting to think that some of it is the same stuff. Like maybe I'm not just going new places. Maybe I'm going to the same places a whole bunch of times, and the same stuff is there. Like there's my room, and there's a crib in it, and a chair, and a snuggly blanket with monkeys. And it's the same room, and the same chair, and the same snuggly blanket every time.

It's way cool that it does that, but it's kind of freaky. I am so totally tripping.

Our friend Angie is coming to visit next week!

I loooove visitors. Mama and Daddy are okay, but I think they're getting jaded. They're good for ten hours or so, and then they're all bland, boring, bedtime, just when I'm warming up and rolling out my best acts.

Also, Mama and Daddy are arguing about what to call my dinosaurs. I can't pronounce any of the options. (On the plus side, though, I have more dinosaurs now. I used to just have a red one, and now there's a red one, and a purple one, and a green one. I love purple stuff. And red stuff. And stuff I can hold. I really like holding stuff. And Mama and Daddy seem to like arguing about what to call things - you would not believe how long it took them to name me - so they're good fun for everybody.)

Grandma has:
Spoons.
Apples, but not hard apples. Soft ones. I wonder where she gets them.
Squishy blocks.
More hair than anyone else in the entire world.
Grandpa. Who has pocket protectors. Which are so nifty.
A special plate she says that I can use when I am big.

When am I big?

Man, I'm so behind on this, but Mama made me some cool icons, and I had to take them for a spin.

There's been a lot going on, and I've been totally busy. Did you know that when you flail really hard in all one direction, you flip over? You have to be pretty focussed about it. One arm to the left while everything else goes right and nothing happens. But you sort of want nothing to happen. Flipping over is freaky.

I keep finding cool stuff. Like paper cups. Paper cups rock. You can hold them, and if you bang them you can make noise, and they roll around. And the other day I got my hands on some plastic tubing, and that was a good time. There are cats in our house, and sometimes I touch them, but it makes Mama and Daddy pretty nervous, and usually the cats don't stick around that long.

I'm working on the cats. I think they're key to something. I just have to figure out what.

I don't think I'm getting through to Mama. I said "deet." Would a tired child say "deet"? I can't imagine it, but there is the possibility of errors in interpretation. I said "thuh." "Thuh" was new. "Thuh" was challenging. I doubt I could pull it off if I really were sleepy, but I guess it didn't convince her. Just to make the point, I gave her a Welsh double ell. She keeps telling me that I'm tired, and I'm not! Dude! Welsh. Double. Ell.

Usually, the big people are opposed to me putting stuff in my mouth. "Please don't eat that, sweetheart," and "Oh no, love, that's not for babies." It's disheartening. Will I ever really understand electrical cords if I never get to bite one?

Tonight, they gave me this bit of squashy stuff. I was busy, so I pretty much ignored it, and then Dad put it in my mouth. It was very weird. I think it was some sort of trick. I spat it back at him.

I am not sleepy.

My friend Pip was stuck in traffic today. Poor Pip. Traffic is the worst. The car seats (horrible, baby-torturing devices) are really only okay if stuff is moving. Really. Otherwise, you just kind of sit there, with no one to talk to, staring at the back wall of the car, while the car seat toys that are supposed to entertain you swing back and forth making daft jingly noises, and the people who usually materialize when you cry stubbornly refusing to appear. I don't know what it is with the car. Usually when I cry, the people are right there - sob, BAMF, hey it's Mama! Or Dad! Or Grandma! The car makes it not work. That's why I hate the car so much.

There may be a point to some kinds of rolling over. They've developed this habit of putting me down wrong lately (I don't know how this happened, they used to always get it right), and rolling over fixes it.

The adults are all about rolling over. "Oooh, you almost rolled over!" "If you just kicked that leg a bit, you could roll over!" Well, I've thought about it, and they're barking.

You know what happens when you roll over? You wind up on your belly! And you can't turn your head around to look at stuff, so the whole room is behind you! There could be cats or people or anything, and you wouldn't know.

I don't know why I expected better. These are the people who are all gung-ho about sleep, after all. (Like sleep is worthwhile. Besides, stuff keeps getting changed around while I'm asleep. Like last night, when I went to sleep, it was dark out, and it was light when I woke up. And sometimes, I've fallen asleep in the car and woken up at a party, which I guess is okay, but there've been times when I fell asleep at a party and woke up in the car.) Anyway, I've decided I'm not doing it. Not rolling over. It's just not worth it.

I am one season old today. Three months old yesterday. I'm just that good.

And tonight I get to meet my new cousin! She's just a baby, and I'm really excited.

Wow, it's hot. I feel like this is the hottest it's ever been in my life!

Mom and dad are displaying a surprisingly united front and claiming that it will cool off soon. I hope so...

I've heard that I'm a bunny. And a button. And a bean. And a bear. Make up your dang minds, people.

Wow, silks is fun!

Maybe next time dad will let me go up on my own. He is so embarrassing.